Tuesday, March 1, 2016

Super Tuesday: Breaking down the candidates one insult at a time

Dear Super Tuesday, 

Today 11 states will hold there presidential primaries. With that 595 total delegates will be up for grab to help determine who will represent the Republicans and Democrats when November rolls around to decide the next President of the United States. With this position comes not only a great paycheck and housing accommodations but also a country that is at a breaking point both financially and culturally. In case you haven't turned on your TV in sometime (which isn't a bad thing) here is a rundown of your options along with a brief bio of those vying to be the the next leader of the free world: 

Republican: 

Donald Trump: Great hair and at one time was a favorite of mine. He explained what he wanted to do too make this country great again and how he was going to do it. Critics chastised him for his unfiltered comments and failures in business but that’s what this country needs, someone not afraid to make the hard decisions and put America first and foremost. As the campaign has worn on I’ve now soured too the direction he has taken…Attacking other candidates and not focusing on the task at hand. His 3 answers currently to any question asked are: 1. Ted Cruz is an illegal. 2. Marco Rubio needs a diaper. 3. Build a wall. 

Ted Cruz: Looks very creepy and I wouldn't take a piece of candy from him if he offered. At one time he was a Tea Party darling and a game changer in Washington when first elected. He bucked the trend of the elitist career politicians and blazed his own path, accomplishing the goals of his constituents, not the lobbyist who tried to line his pockets. His campaign was also built on his ability to give straight, intelligent answers on how he was going to fix this country. Like Trump, his campaign has transformed from integrity and intelligence to attacking his Republican competitors. 

Marco Rubio: The Republican Party’s hand picked candidate for president. Young, intelligent,  immigrant roots and not Jeb Bush. Even after a disappointing finish in the Iowa Caucus he continued to follow the party’s playbook, thus making him the “it” candidate for the Republicans. But alas, like his previously mentioned rivals he too has steered away from the issues at hand and instead has gone to a comedic routine whenever a mic presents itself to him. I don't want to hear about The Donald peeing his pants, I want to hear how you are going to change the direction of this country. I’m hoping you see a pattern here….

Democrats: 

Hillary Clinton: Better known as Bill’s wife and a career politician she is also Obama 2.0 and we all know where that has got this country over the last 8 years. She lacks the charisma of her “husband” and the ability to read a teleprompter like her predecessor but like Rubio is the hand picked candidate of her party. She like her Republican counterparts feels that the best way to help America is to let her voters know that she can drop insults against her competitor in the same party rather than explain to them how she is going to fix the problems that we all face. Plus, did I mention that she is a liberal? Nothing good comes of that. 

Bernie Sanders: A socialist hailing from Vermont who I’m still not convinced is Larry David. He wants to give every one free healthcare, tuition, phones, cars, computers and no new taxes but still has no idea how it is going to get done. What Larry, I mean “Bernie” had going for him was that he had a generation of kids 18-25 who have received participation trophies their whole lives and were wiling to back him. Scary thought. Alas, he too for some reason decided to divert from what was working and instead thought that attacking Hill Dog would help bring the Democrat’s voting base together. Remember that pattern I was referring too with the Republican candidates…  

As the campaign process moves further along candidates from each party are beginning to consider themselves the leader in the race to be president. Stating you are the leading candidate in each party’s race in 2016 is like saying you're the smartest kid in a Chico State master’s program. It really doesn't hold any weight. I’m not a campaign manager but I’ll play one for the sake of this piece. When you are participating in a debate, rally or just talking to a potential voter as you're walking down the street, try not to sling mud in one of your competitor’s direction when asked a question. This technique has worked for me….Answer the question honestly and eloquently too the best of your ability!!! See how easy that is??? On the plus side it makes you look intelligent, which is what we all want in a leader. Simple and too the point. When is someone who is running for the highest office in this land going too realize what the people of this great nation really want? the constant negative attacks towards other candidates in your same party let alone the competing one doesn't make you a leader, it makes you weak. Which in turn makes this country weak. Those are both really bad things in a world that doesn't respect us anymore. As the campaign process continues to roll along to the elections let’s hope that a candidate from either sides rises above all others and focuses on how to fix this country and bringing it together rather than dropping insults like they are auditioning for Def Jam. God Bless America and I’m Marcus Monroe and I approve this ad….

Happy Tuesday peeps on this first day of March. May it be filled with tacos and good times and remember….Life without Mexican food is like no life at all. Ariba. 


#supertuesday #republican #democrat #trump #cruz #rubio #clinton #sanders #makeamericagreatagain #empireliving