Friday, December 30, 2016

Resolutions that we can all get behind

Dear 2017, 

Resolutions are pledged by many of us as one year comes to a close and another opens with new possibilities. Things like go to the gym, eat better or drink less come to mind. Most have great intentions to stick with these plans from the start but always seem to fade into their old habits. Change is probably the toughest thing for a human to do. It’s scary, we get so use to our routines and forget that in order move forward in life we must constantly evolve. I’m guilty of it. This year though, I am going to share with you the changes that I will be implementing in my life and I will keep you updated on my progress….

1. Think before I speak: This has always been a struggle for me. Sometimes I say things that hurt people and not realize it till after the damage has been done. Masking it with sarcasm is an excuse I plan on no longer using. Along with getting professional help (yes, you heard that right peeps), I’m asking you guys to call me out if you see me doing it. We all get by with a little help from our friends. 

2. Say “I love you” more: To your significant other, friends or family that you love, this phrase never gets old. We tend to not use it enough and assume that the people we do love already know how you feel about them. Those 3 words can change someone’s day and put a smile on their face. Use them generously, the results will be tremendous. 

3. Listen: This skill is so powerful yet so hard to master as a male. I am a problem solver by nature but need to realize that sometimes I don't need to offer answers when the person you love has a problem or just wants to talk. Simply sitting there quiet and actively listening to what they have to say is the only thing they desire at that moment. Doing so will strengthen your relationship, thus brighten your future. 

4. Focus: On relationships, work, hobbies, etc. My ADD gets the better of me on occasions and I find myself not putting 100% to the task at hand sometimes, which I never want to do. Writing helps me with this so plan on more material in the coming year. 

5. Open up: As someone who has been on there own from a young age I sometimes have issues sharing things with those closest to me. When a problem arises, confide in that person you trust. Getting it out in the open can prevent small issues from becoming larger ones. The ability to communicate one on one with another person is a humans greatest asset and we don't use it enough. 

6. Be humble: I sometimes cross that line between confidence and cockiness. A man’s ego can get in the way both socially and professionally and the results are never good. If you see me doing this throat punch me. I’ll know that I deserved it. 

7. Happiness: I know this maybe cliche but stop and take a moment and appreciate the people, dogs and things you have in your life. God put them there for a reason, which is to make you smile so do so, because one day may be gone. 

8. Make America Great: I love this country, it’s flag, my guns and the people who defend it every day. We are all one and need to start acting that way. Until we accomplish this we are just another country. Let’s not let those great men who created this nation 240 years ago down. Merica. 

2016 the struggle was real for us all. Here’s to family, friends, loved ones and popping bottles as we open a new chapter. God Bless and I love you peeps! 

PS. I hope y'all have an amazing weekend, stay bundled it’s going to be a cold one and raise your glasses to what to com and remember…..This isn’t my first rodeo, says the person at there second. 

#newyears #newyearseve #deuces2016 #hello2017 #resolutions #empireliving 

Wednesday, December 14, 2016

My Jerry Maguire moment...

Dear Self, 

(I’m going to go against my own rules of social media & discuss something personal with you.) 

My name is Marc Breckenridge and I have a problem. I have a penchant for driving away those who care the most about me. When things are good, I can find a way to destroy them and in the process, hurt deeply those who care about me the most. 

Why do I do this??? My answer to myself over the years is that it’s a self-protection method, it is my way of letting people close, but not close enough to eventually hurt me, when in reality I’m the one that is causing the suffering. I will say things to family, friends or a loved one and find myself questioning those words a moment later. They are not meant to be hurtful, but when I slowdown and analyze it, I realize that it is quite the opposite. Which is wrong to all parties involved. 

The real problem is a lot of times I don't realize that I'm doing it. In conversation or when I find myself joking around I use sarcasm as a defense mechanism that while I feel it may be playful and funny at times, it ends up hurting the other person. Sometimes in ways I may never know. 

Have you ever heard of the “quicksand” effect? You know what I’m talking about, when something you say hurts the other, they retaliate with words that they know will hurt you and this process repeats itself until both are mad and full of hate and anger towards the other…quicksand….The faster you try to get out, the deeper you find yourself. It is in this dark place that people who care about one another are not suppose to be. Add alcohol to this mix and the effect only greatly enhances itself. To best find your way out of this situation is just like rescuing yourself from real quicksand….Slow down. Think before you speak and most importantly know that you love and care about that other person so why on earth would you do or say anything to hurt them? It’s something we all learn as children but for some reason I and others sometimes forget about it as an adult.  

Here’s a personal example of what I’m talking about… I believe the words I used in a conversation with a loved one recently were, “Oh, I’m the failure?” In no way would I ever use this in a serious tone towards this person or to any other I care about. In my mind, it was meant to be sarcasm, but in reality it hurt the person I would never want to harm. Small words can have the most impact both positive and negative. Sometimes not saying a word at these moments is best, you may or may not know what this person is going through. 

As I continue to run off all the people who have genuinely loved me over my lifetime I sit here and ponder where I will be years from now. Will I be old, lonely and full of regret or do I fix this “fault” that I have carried with me my entire life? 

If you are a betting person, I would lay the mortgage on the latter. Constant self-improvement doesn't happen over night as much as we all would like it too. It takes hard work, and continuing to own up to your mistakes. Gains however small can be great, especially when the end result is a smile on the faces of the people you love and cherish the most. God Bless….

Ps. Thank you peeps for allowing me this forum to break away from the norm and discuss an issue like this. I know I’m not the only one out there and if this can help just one person then it is a win for everyone involved…Call it Christmas magic and remember….Fight for the fairy tale, it does exist…Believe that. 

#selfimprovement #identifytheproblem #gains #thrive #merrychristmas #empireliving