Dear Satan,
You have had many fine residents over the last few years join you in your little paradise known as Hell (when I say Hell I am not talking about the stretch of road that runs from Modesto to Bakersfield or the hamlet that we in God’s Country refer to as Oroville.). From the billionaire cave dweller who is still wondering where those 72 virgins are that he was promised to the former ruler of that country we are currently on the tab for at a $60 billion clip you have the makings of your very own rat pack. With yesterdays passing of Hugo Chavez those boys along with the vertically challenged puppet with the 80’s troll hairdo and a passion for Elvis (who can blame him for that) that called North Korea home now have a 4th for those heated shuffle board games on Friday nights. Now I know old HC is going to rant and rave like those long time residents Stalin and Mussolini about the joys of socialism and everything they did for the people of their country’s and the evils of capitalism and continue to wonder why they didn’t get to punch that ticket to visit St. Peter at the pearly gate. Once again reaffirm to them and your new guest who can be as fiery as a double shot of siriracha that he and the rest of his new dorm mates are in the right place and soon will be joined by the right handed former junk ball inning eater that heads that paradise 90 miles off the coast of Florida once someone shuts off the jukebox that keeps blasting the theme from “Weekend at Bernie’s” and they can all smile and know that the current leader of the greatest country in the world continues to try and implement their failed socialist agenda on the hard working people of our great nation.
PS. Happy hump day peeps from beautiful Northern California and remember….Tramp stamps are God’s Google maps for single fellows.
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